Going Gray and Loving It

gray collageFinish the Sentence FridayThis week’s sentence is “We can either be traditional or non-traditional in the way we do things, I…CHOOSE TO TAKE A STAND.”

So this post is a bit off topic…but here goes.

About six years ago I was told by a former co-worker that I would indeed dye my hair when I saw grays. She insisted upon this after I said I have not dyed, highlighted, or straightened my hair since I was in my late twenties and I never will again. Why? I finally loved myself and was/am happy with who I am. I don’t want to spend money on things that won’t make me happy.

It took me a long time, but I love my thick, unruly, curly, hair…and now with a few grays. I have always said and agree that gray hair is sexy.

There was another former co-worker who let her grays come in and owned it. She wasn’t beautiful because of her grays…she was just beautiful, she felt it and owned it. She walked around with CONFIDENCE and others felt it and reacted to her accordingly…Confidence goes a long way! 

Finish the Sentence Friday

I have always believed and still do that even the skinny, almost naked supermodel and actress still stand in front of the mirror and critique on their bodies…maybe even more than the average lady. I know I am not perfect, I love all my imperfections and flaws, they make me who I am. 

My son will grow up knowing that real beauty comes from within…not hiding under makeup, fancy clothes, or expensive hair. It comes from who we are…the rest just enhances our beauty. He will find a women who doesn’t need to be validated by him or expect her to look a certain way. He will love her for who she is, and her for who he is.

So back to my gray hair, I embrace it and squeal with delight when I find another one. I love it and know I am going to rock it!


First of all society is to blame…we want women to be natural but then attack a woman when she feels and acts sexy. We want women to be sexy but call them wh*res and sl*ts when they act that way. Do men have the same harsh criticism? NOPE. 

If we want to age gracefully we have to believe that we are beautiful…not “because of” or “in spite of”…we are beautiful and that is that. Accept who we are, love who we are and everyone else will. Who cares what society wants, who cares what others think. You are YOU. Your body is YOURS…live, love, laugh. You are beautiful. That is what we need to tell our children…SHOW our children.

Come one everyone just say it… “I AM BEAUTIFUL” no ifs, buts, excuses, explanations, footnotes, prepositions….just


Do you feel the power? Say it every morning, noon, and night, say it when you walk in a room,when you get out of the car.

Am I saying that you are more beautiful or better than others? NOPE…we are all beautiful, but we have to BELIEVE it before anyone else will.

If you don’t believe it, how can you expect your children to believe it? Do you want them to grow up feeling less than? Start now…

Take a stand for your children. Take a stand for every women who who believes she needs to go under the knife to be beautiful. Take a stand for every girl who reads a magazine and thinks she will never be that beautiful. Take a stand for every boy who thinks real beauty can only be found on a TV screen. Take a stand for every backwards and ridiculous fashion rule out there. Make your OWN fashion. Take a stand for yourself, love yourself.



hair Collage



Going Gray and Loving It — 36 Comments

  1. Karen, I seriously need to hug you. I have a ton of gray and yet inline you I cannot let it go. I have been dying and highlighting my hair for years. I did let it go for a bit when I was pregnant and then after I had Lily, because I just didn’t have the time, but now I am so due and will be going in the next few weeks, because I honestly just can’t stand the sight of gray on my head. You are truly my hero and god I am blown away by your view point on this though! 🙂

  2. I lost all my hair to chemo, and it’s now coming in nearly all gray. Since my hair was pretty damaged from all the curling, blow drying and coloring I’d done to it in the past, I look at this as a chance to start over, with healthy hair…..so regardless of color, texture, etc., I am going to leave it natural from here on out! At this point, that means gray, fine, thick, short and somewhat curly (that last part is a whole new experience for me….it used to be SUPER straight!!).

    • It’s amazing how the body can change, (HUGS) for having to go through chemo, I hope you are 100% healthy now. You fought a hard struggle, you deserve to love yourself and enjoy a new you.

  3. You go, girl! I’d take your curls any day, but you are right. We need to embrace and love who we are and be thankful for all the wonderful things about us!

    • I think we always want/admire others’ hair and looks. But, while it would be nice not to have to deal with frizzy curls, I wouldn’t trade them for anything. yes, absolutely we need to be thankful.

  4. I LOVE THIS POST!! Absolutely we need to be confident in the skin we’re in. It doesn’t mean we can’t “pretty ourselves up” once in a (long) while, but it DOES mean that true beauty is not just the cookie cutter barbie doll that Society is intent on brainwashing us into becoming. My stretch marks- they are battle scars proclaiming that I brought four perfect babies into the world. My saggy “girls?” Yup- I kept each of those babies alive with my body. I have crows feet at the corners of my eyes. Know why? I SMILE all the time. Rock those grays- they are a badge of maturity, wisdom, and confidence!

  5. I agree. I am only 29 and a couple of years ago I discovered that I’m getting a white streak in my hair. It’s not spread around… it’s all right in the front in one chunk. I think it’s pretty cool and my hubby and I joke about how I’ll look like Rogue from X-men. I think that in order to “age gracefully,” you need to just let it happen and try to keep yourself healthy.

  6. Karen, this is amazing and SO inspiring! I am so conflicted about this. I actually wrote a post earlier in the week called Halfway Between 30 and 40 about how I want to embrace the changes that are happening with my body, but what a hard time I am having with the values that are imposed on us (yes, it’s OUR choice whether to believe them) and how we are so conditioned to subscribe to society’s beauty commentary. I hate it so much… and yet I dye my f-ing hair and feel bad about my extra 10 pounds! I especially appreciated your points about the glaring differences between how aging is perceived for men vs women. Seriously, mama, you rocked this post, and your grays! Go you!

    • thanks babe…I loved this post and felt it in my heart. I want my son to know that beauty comes from inside…not how we look on the outside. YOU ROCK TOO!

  7. I’m interested to see how I’ll handle the changes of getting older. I’ve always struggled with body image. Trying to focus on being the BEST and HEALTHIEST ME! I commend your conquer!

  8. I started going gray some time ago and have a back and forth relationship with it. Sometimes I let they have their way and other times I scream and color them. If they didn’t come in vivid white patches in the front like a headband I would let them go but the stark contrast drives me nuts! I wish mine would grow in like yours. Rock those curls and grays 🙂 And hi from Sharefest

  9. Wonderful post. I am a gray gal! I have 5 grandkids and have never dyed my hair my entire life. I want it as beautiful as my mothers beautiful gray locks. Coming over from #SitsShareFest glad I stopped in.

  10. Karen, I needed to read this today. I am beautiful with my wrinkles, bags under my eyes, and the 10 pounds I’m walking around with. I want my son to know that so it’s time for me to know it. You rock. And you are beautiful!

    • Exactly Kristi, we want our sons to know what real beauty is and not what society says beauty is. YOu are beautiful babe, you are a mom, you are wise and powerful…

  11. There’s never a bad time to hear this message. Thank you Karen! Everyday is another small battle to wage against all those nasty messages being sent to our children. This was motivational to keep on going.

  12. I always thought a natural look is so much nicer than helmet head – which is what some dye jobs look like including my mothers. My hair is the color if dish-water and remains so into my 50’s. A little highlight does the trick.

  13. I am ambivalent about my gray hair because even though I am 43 I still don’t have one. My sister who is 3 years younger than me and pulls them out every time one shows it’s wiry face! I always think I will let it go, but I fear with my coarse hair I will turn out looking like Albert Einstein. I am sure time will tell!

    • I think think have special conditioner and products for coarser gray hair…I may have to start buying it soon. I heard pulling them out makes them come back in doubles or triples 😉

  14. My husband always says I’ll end up dying my hair too. I’m not sure where he got that idea? Maybe from his mom because she dyes hers? I’m not though, and I told him so. My grandma rocked her gray hair, both of them actually, and I have every intention of doing the same.

    I have twenty or so…and though they don’t make me squeal in delight (you are far more advanced than me in that area), they don’t make me sad either. 🙂

    Thank you for linking to Super Sunday Sync! I loved your post. 🙂

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