Funny Friday February

funny friday

Today’s post is this month’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write 5 captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them and see what they’ve come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

Funny Friday | www.BakingInATornado.com | #MyGraphics

Here’s today’s picture. It was submitted by The Bergham Chronicles  http://berghamchronicles.blogspot.com

68d47901-be2a-4e7b-aa06-5e36dfe78ab3

1.  Yup, I plan on NOT sleeping through he night and waking up at 5 am. Mommy’s gonna need LOTS of coffee. 

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2.  Going to add what I want to the cart. If I don’t get what I want, I’ll just have a major temper tantrum in this store…works every time. 

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3.  Mommy thinks this coffee is for her, but I plan on spreading it all over the rug when she passes out from exhaustion. 

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4.  I’ll just switch the regular with decaf, that will show Mommy who really needs to take a nap. 

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5. Once Mommy empties these out, I can use them to bang with metal spoons. I can’t wait to see her lose her mind. 

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Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:

]

Funny Friday January

funny friday

Today’s post is this month’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write 5 captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them and see what they’ve come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

Funny Friday | www.BakingInATornado.com | #MyGraphics

Here’s today’s picture. It was submitted by Dinosaur Superhero Mommy
(http://dinoheromommy.com/)

funny firday jan

1.  Wait? What are we drinking?

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2.  Daddy if you just smile, she’ll stop taking pictures.

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3.  This better not end up on Facebook.

      It won’t, I promise.

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4.  “See, Mommy. I drank all my hot chocolate. Can I have more?”

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5. Tony’s inner thoughts…Shoot, I got caught. I forgot to take out the old toys, remove the soda from the table, and put the shovels away. Maybe if I don’t look at her she won’t notice. Quick, tell her you made her organic hot chocolate, that might distract her. 

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Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:

]

January Use Your Words

use-your-words

Today’s post is a writing challenge. This is how it works: participating bloggers picked 4 – 6 words or short phrases for someone else to craft into a post. All words must be used at least once and all the posts will be unique as each writer has received their own set of words. That’s the challenge, here’s a fun twist; no one who’s participating knows who got their words and in what direction the writer will take them. Until now.

At the end of this post you’ll find links to the other blogs featuring this challenge. Check them all out, see what words they got and how they used them.

I’m using:

Valued customer ~ New ~ Channel ~ Various ~ Post ~ Instead
They were submitted by: http://berghamchronicles.blogspot.com     

 

“Hi, this is Tanya. How can I help you?”

“Well, I am sitting here trying to figure out why I can’t get the new pair of Chanel shoes for a discount. I’ve been buying things from your online store for years. I deserve a discount.”

“I am sorry miss. I think there is a misunderstanding. This number…”

“No! There is no misunderstanding. I am a valued customer. I want those shoes for a discount now.”

“Miss, I am trying to explain to you that I can’t help you with that. I work…”

“Oh yes you will help me. I can’t believe how much money I spent on various clothes, bags, and shoes. You will give me what I want instead of wasting my time. It’s what you do for a living, now do it.”

“Can I please explain to you why I can’t help you?”

“I want to speak to your manager now! All I want is a discount for the shoes. I am going to blast your company on my blog. I am going to post about this on Facebook. I hope you get fired for not helping me.”

“Okay miss. I will transfer you to my boss. One moment.”

“Yeah sure, you’ll put me on hold for thirty minutes. Moron.”

The phone is just handed to the person next to Tanya. “Good Afternoon, Milford Public Library. This is Connie speaking, how cna I help you?”

“What? Library? Did she transfer me to the library? How dare she. I want that twit fired.”

“No miss. You have been talking to a reference librarian the entire time. Tanya tried to tell you this, but instead you kept yelling at her and calling her names.”

“You need to teach your librarians how to speak to people and deal with customers.”

“We need to keep this line open for patrons of the library. Have a nice day.” Connie says quickly then hangs up the phone. She turns to Tanya and they just laugh at the absurdity of the call.

A few minutes later books are plopped on the counter in front of Tanya and Connie. “I want to reutrn these books, but the clerk won’t take them.”

Tanya grabs Connie’s arm at the sound of the woman’s voice. It’s her! The woman who just called about the shoes.

Connie opens the books. “Miss, these books are from a library in the state of Washington.”

“So? Just send them over. You do that all the time.”

“No. We send and receive books from withing our own county, in the same state. We can’t send books from Washington. We live in California.”

“Well what am I supposed to do with them then?”

“Bring them back to the library you got them from.”

The woman stares then huffs. “I don’t have time to do that. I have a manicure and pedicure at two and a hair appointment at four. I don’t have time for this. It’s your job to take care of books, so do just that.”

Before Connie can respond the woman turns around, flips her hair and walks out on stiletto heels. As soon as she’s out the door a limo pulls up. The woman effortlessly gets in and the limo speeds off.

Tanya looks at Connie and once again all they can do is laugh.

 

Links to the other “Use Your Words” posts:

Funny Friday December

funny friday

Today’s post is this month’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write 5 captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them and see what they’ve come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

funny friday2222Here’s today’s picture. It was submitted by Follow me home (http://followmehome.shellybean.com).
funny friday2222222

  1. “OMG, Earl don’t stop. Keep on driving.” 

 

2. “Hey, Could I get a lift?”

 

3. “Pssst. You up for a fun time, good looking?”

 

4. “Darn it Sharon. The llama escaped again. I told you they were up to no good.”

 

5. The tour guide turns to the guests. “Now we are coming upon a new species of  llama. He also helps Rudolph, Santa, and allt he other reindeeer. His butt lights up, which helps Santa see what he is doing in his sleigh. 

“Puuuulease!” snorted Gina. “Like we are going to believe that nonsense.”

Suddenly the llama turns around and the tour bus is illuminated with red light from the llama’s butt. 

Pictures snapped and ‘ooohs’ and ‘aaahs’ can be heard. The magic of Santa lives on! 

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year

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Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:

Follow me home (http://followmehome.shellybean.com)

Measurements of Merriment (http://measurementsofmerriment.blogspot.com)

Southern Belle Charm (http://www.southernbellecharm.com)

Baking In A Tornado (http://www.BakingInATornado.com)

Someone Else’s Genius (http://www.someoneelsesgenius.com)

Confessions of a part-time working mom (http://thethreegerbers.blogspot.ch/)

Not That Sarah Michelle (http://notthatsarahmichelle.blogspot.com)

Spatulas on Parade  (http://spatulasonparade.blogspot.com/)

The Bergham Chronicles (http://berghamchronicles.blogspot.com/)

]

Funny Friday November

funny friday

Today’s post is this month’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write 5 captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them and see what they’ve come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

Funny Friday | www.BakingInATornado.com | #MyGraphics

Here’s today’s picture. It was submitted by Confessions of a part-time working mom (http://thethreegerbers.blogspot.ch/)

22 - Confessions of a part time working mom - November 2015

1.  This is the last time I ask my husband to make dinner. 

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2.  Spaghetti????? I thought they were fondue sticks! 

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3.  This will be a future Facebook post from me when AJ is a teenager…

“AJ just texted me this picture asking for help. He is not sure how to boil spaghetti? Where did I go wrong?” 

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4.  Mom fail: I was so tired I started to make spaghetti. Three hours later, after eating Chinese take out, I walk into the kitchen to find this. Thankfully, the stove was off the entire time. 

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5. Welcome to new members of the husband training class. Today we have a picture for you. Before we tell you what happened we want you to think about it for a few moments.  

After two minutes had passed, the instructor asked the husbands what they thought had happened. Each of their responses were plausible but far from the truth. Some there was an accident and the family had to run out or kids were being bad and mom needed to leave the kitchen to yell at them. One man thought dinner was interrupted because the wife was turned on and wanted him.

“You are all wrong. A husband, who has learned his lesson, made a comment to his wife while cooking. He said ‘We are having spaghetti for dinner again?’ The moment he said it he knew he had made a fatal mistake.

The paramedics found him covered in pasta sauce with ten dried spaghetti sticking out of his mouth. Several had cut and pierced his gums and tongue.

Let this be a lesson to all of you. Do not make comments about your wife’s cooking.”

One scared man asked “So what do we do?”

The instructor smiled at him. “Excellent question. We will discuss some options for that, as well as, what we as husbands should be doing in the home since we are living there too.”

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Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:

  • The Bergham Chronicles (http://berghamchronicles.blogspot.com/)
  • Follow me home (http://followmehome.shellybean.com)
  • Measurements of Merriment (http://measurementsofmerriment.blogspot.com)
  • Southern Belle Charm (http://www.southernbellecharm.com)
  • Dinosaur Superhero Mommy (http://dinoheromommy.com/)
  • Baking In A Tornado (http://www.BakingInATornado.com)
  • Someone Else’s Genius (http://www.someoneelsesgenius.com)
  • Confessions of a part-time working mom (http://thethreegerbers.blogspot.ch/)
  • The Momisodes (http://themomisodes.com)
  • Spatulas on Parade  (http://spatulasonparade.blogspot.com/)

]

Funny Friday October

funny friday

Today’s post is this month’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write 5 captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them and see what they’ve come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

Funny Friday | www.BakingInATornado.com | #MyGraphics

Here’s today’s picture. It was submitted by Someone Else’s Genius (http://www.someoneelsesgenius.com/).

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1.  Tom set the last pheasant in place. With a push of a few buttons they would pop out at the correct times. He knew they would only need one take for the forest scene. This movie, Attack of Mutant Pheasants, would be bigger than Birds. 

2.  “No need for the old hide-a-key stone. We have our very own pheasant-key. It just brings the key to us when we say the magic word.”

3.  Those bastards think they are going to have me for dinner. I’ll hide here and when they least expect it, I’ll sneak into the house and peck their eyes out. **evil pheasant laugh**

4.  Play hide and seek. It will be fun they said. Now I’m stuck under this bush and I can’t get out. Since they all suck at this game, I fear I may never be found. 

5. Quinn just sat down with her glass of wine and popcorn to binge watch Scream Queens. When the show cut off and an emergency broadcast symbol appeared on the screen. 

“We interrupt your regularly scheduled show for a special announcement. There is a viscous animal on the loose. Police are looking for a pheasant that has been specifically trained to attack and kill anyone who gets too close. Please get everyone inside and lock your doors. Do not be fooled by his sweet appearance, this is a fierce killer that is able to tear a man’s legs to shreds.”

Quinn hated living alone when things like this happened. It couldn’t be real, but why take a chance. Her doors were locked and she lived on the fourth floor. There is no way a pheasant could get up hear. They don’t fly, do they? She walked to the kitchen to shut the only opened window when a strange noise stopped her. She couldn’t move when she spotted the bird on her she sat the bird on her bed. The last thing she saw was a the bird flapping its wings. As the bird landed on her head, she let out one last scream before becoming silent forever.  

Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:

]

Funny Friday September

funny friday

Today’s post is this month’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write 5 captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them and see what they’ve come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

Funny Friday | www.BakingInATornado.com | #MyGraphics

Here’s today’s picture. It was submitted by Spatulas on Parade  (http://spatulasonparade.blogspot.com/).

 

Funny Friday, Spatulas on Parade | www.BakingInATornado.com

1.  “Ha ha, you can’t get me Mommy.”
     “You sure about that?”

2.  “Good job! I knew you could do it! You’re such a great climber!”

3.  “Mommy, help! I can’t get down.”
“Well you should of thought of that before you climbed up there. Just sit still and I’ll get you.”

4.  “Please, Mommy. I’m waiting for the fudge and chocolate shop to open. I really want a treat.”
“You already got treats from the local deli. We need to get back to the forest.” 

5.  The tour guide stops in front of the fudge and chocolate shop. “This one statue has quite a history. A bear cub kept finding its way into town and climbing the tree above the shop. It was waiting for a customer to drop a treat. The mother bear would follow him, chase him up the tree, then drag him back to the woods while he cried.”

“That can’t be true.” a voice from the back of the tourists called. 

Sam smiled. “It’s true! Or is it one of the many wooden statues that a local artist added to bring culture to our town. Guess you’ll just have to ask around. Though be careful, everyone has their own ideas about the history of the statue.” 

Tina, a local walked by. “I heard the statues are all of baby animals not listening to their mommies. It’s supposed to be a lesson for kids, to show them they need listen to their parents while shopping in town.” She winked at Sam and continued walking down the street. 

Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:

]

Funny Friday August

funny friday

Today’s post is this month’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write 5 captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them and see what they’ve come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

Inline image 1

Here’s today’s picture. It was submitted by Sanity Waiting to Happen (http://www.angelaweight.com).

Inline image 3

1. I don’t feel like Wonder Woman,  I can’t believe I paid $100 for this crap.

2. I told mommy I refuse to wear this ridiculous bib. I’m not messy, I’m adorable.

3. Is this gluten free, organic, NON-GMO, and made locally?

4. Just going to leave a few pieces of food in my parent’s bed. They’ll love the surprise.

5. Perfect, mommy just sat down.  Time to cry about the sandwich and demand she make another one. 

 

Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:

Funny Friday July

funny friday

Today’s post is this month’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write 5 captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them and see what they’ve come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

Inline image 1

Here’s today’s picture. It was submitted by Sanity Waiting to Happen (http://www.angelaweight.com).

Inline image 2

1. Dammit Earl, stop crying and jump off the damn truck. Roll and tuck, then run. We can get away before he turns us into steaks. 

2. Are these cows or a cow centipede? 

3. I know my wife will LOVE these garden cows, all the neighbors will be jealous. 

4. Cows laughing from behind the bushes.

Earl: “Those dumb ranchers thought those were real cows.”

Jim: “I know and they say humans are smart.”

 5. The effects of Monsanto’s poison has now turned cows into plastic. When will the use of GMOs stop? 

Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:

Funny Friday

Funny Friday, June 2015

Today’s post is this month’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write 5 captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them and see what they’ve come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

Funny Friday  150 X 150.jpg

Here’s today’s picture. It was submitted by The Momisodes (http://themomisodes.com))

17 - Momisodes June 2015.jpg

This is my first Funny Friday!!! Glad to be part of a another awesome group post. I tried my best, so here goes. 

1. The mom buries her head in her hands and grumbles to the Sear’s photographer. “Just take the damn picture. I don’t have the patience anymore.” 

2. Yup, this is our holiday card…you’re lucky you got one.

3. The kids laugh out loud…”Mommy said not to make a mess in the house, she didn’t say anything about the moon.”

4. As the aliens fly away on their spaceships they mumble, “Those darn human kids. I thought we’d finally have a peaceful vacation.”

 5. “This can’t be the new indoor play are. I think mom tricked us.”  

Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:

Confessions of a part-time working mom
The Momisodes
Sanity Waiting to Happen
Spatulas on Parade
People Don’t Eat Enough Fudge
The Bergham’s Life Chronicles
Follow me home
Measurements of Merriment
Southern Belle Charm
Silence of the Mom
Dinosaur Superhero Mommy
Baking In A Tornado
Someone Else’s Genius